10 ways Kazuya from Tekken could be a better dad

Being a parent is hard, but being a better parent than Tekken’s Kazuya Mishima is very easy. Judging another person’s parenting skills is usually taboo, but he’s such a bastard that it’s perfectly fair game. Let’s face it – trying to kill your son and running an international mega-corporation that commits crimes against the world on a daily basis doesn’t look good.

His son, Jin Kazama, had his own moral flaws and villainous murders, but those are clearly just cries for help. We’re not qualified parenting experts, but neither is Kazuya Mishima qualified to be a father, so here we are. We would like to give the martial artist some healthy suggestions for different activities to do with Jin to help offset the years of trauma. By the looks of it, he’s the worst dad alive, but here are 10 ways Kazuya von Tekken could be a better dad.

Write some mad libs

Imagine the breakthroughs Kazuya and Jin would have if they just sat down with a Mad Libs book and started filling in the craziest nouns, verbs, and adjectives they could think of into the empty gaps that they could absolutely do not belong. A good laugh could help open the way to address violent family trauma. Old habits are hard to break, so they’d probably start with something like, “Carol went to the Temple at dawn To seek revenge And destroy their enemies‘ but everyone has to start somewhere, I guess. This is a healthier form of attachment than attempted murder.

Go bird watching

What could be more relaxing than bird watching? Kazuya and Jin would probably find it exciting to sit in a nearby park and look out for a gentle dove, a compassionate robin, or a majestic hawk. Perhaps it would be healthy practice to sketch their favorite birds, share them, and compliment each other. These are the kinds of quiet, precious moments these bloodthirsty madmen should share, filling their minds with quiet inspiration rather than outright malice.

Play a board game

Who’s up for a Monopoly game? Actually, a game of brutal capitalism is the last thing Kazuya gets to play. How about a risk game? No, wait, that would be worse. Okay, what about Clue/Cluedo? Kazuya spent years searching the world for his own father, Heihachi Mishima, to confront and assassinate him, so his deduction skills should impress his son and make for a board game night to remember. The picture above is not a fun board game night.

Throw the ball around the yard

We don’t know if Kazuya Mishima has a front yard with a neatly trimmed lawn and a white picket fence, but this would be the perfect setting for just tossing a baseball back and forth with Jin. If he doesn’t have such a place, they could presumably do so on the rubble of a village decimated as a result of horrific war crimes committed by Kazuya’s Mishima Zaibatsu mega-corporation. What ever. Anything but ritual sacrifices.

Go to the cinema

Sitting on a mountain of riches (blood money mostly) means Kazuya Mishima can barely afford a large popcorn, two fountain drinks, and a box of M&Ms chocolates from the concession stand at the local movie theater. Surely a night out with The Notebook would bring tears to even those men whose hearts were so touched by Rachel McAdams’ classic performance. Nothing in the Tekken series suggests The Notebook is a Mishima family favorite, but there’s nothing to suggest otherwise either.

Go fishing

Kazuya, rent a boat or something and take your son on a fishing trip. We’ve seen enough movies, wall calendars, and pharmaceutical ads to know that this is something people do to connect; So of course Kazuya and Jin should try this. They have no choice but to talk about it when alone in a boat on a scenic lake. As long as they don’t leave the boat. In all honesty, they don’t seem to have body types that are easily suited to swimming.

Take a paint and sip class

Jin and his father would surely be the most fascinating people to attend their evening class, Painting with a Twist. Kazuya is able to bring a crate of beer for them to share while trying to follow the teacher’s instructions. They spend their lives fighting and beating enemies into submission, but they should take the time to quietly paint a sunflower in the neon lights of a rented mall. Yes, they should do their best here as well to complement each other’s works.

To apologize

Pride is a cruel thing; it spoils and dulls the soul. Can Kazuya Mishima put his pride aside for a moment and apologize to Jin for putting a bounty on his head and using him as a vessel for a demonic ritual sacrifice? I hope so. Instead of throwing hands, throw excuses.

In doing so, they may even understand that they actually have a lot in common because of their shared experiences. They were both strapped onto a rocket that was sent into orbit and then ejected from a space station, only to be burned up on re-entry into Earth’s atmosphere. I’m not sure which of these was canon, so it’s safest to assume both are canon.

therapy

It’s clear that the father-son relationship between Kazuya and Jin needs some healing. How does Jin feel about her twisted past? Why couldn’t Kazuya always forgive his own father Heihachi? Why is Jin’s mother Kazumi able to summon a tiger at will? You need to unpack all this with the help of a professional. However, we are not personally qualified to conduct this conversation. Please get us out of this, but let us know how it goes.

Hear

In any relationship, the most important thing one person can do to help the other party heal is to listen. everyone just wants to be heard. Stunned by his thirst for revenge on his own father, Kazuya never sat and listened to Jin; Instead, he even fights him on the Bandai Namco logo, ready to pound on any block. Maybe Jin wanted to talk about his favorite Bad Girls Club episode, share the secrets of his high school friend Ling Xiaoyu, share martial arts tips, or talk about hair gel. If Jin had had the chance to be heard, things might have turned out differently. It’s not too late, Kazuya.

While this list may get off the rails (and it is), I still believe that Kazuya Mishima has what it takes to turn a page and stop being the world’s worst dad. Though I thought about it, his father Heihachi threw him into a volcano not once, but twice.

Okay, Kazuya is easily the second worst dad in the world. Being thrown into a volcano as a child is not okay, but that is no justification for inflicting this trauma and suffering on your own son.

We trust that the next installment in the Tekken franchise will finally see Kazuya and Jin spending time together engaging in each and every one of the activities above, finally reconciling their differences forever, and enjoying the healthy father-son relationship , which they have always longed for.