UK’s Matt Hudson-Smith reveals suicide intention

UK’s Matt Hudson-Smith has revealed he’s been trying to commit suicide for three years in “absolute hell”.

The 27-year-old won bronze in the 400m at the World Championships on Friday but admits he has suffered from mental health issues over a number of years with injuries.

The European champion reached 44.66 seconds to the finish line behind Michael Norman of the United States and Kirani James of Grenada, who took the silver medal ahead of Eugene.

Hudson-Smith overcame Achilles, a hamstring and hip injury that has decimated his hopes on the track since 2019 and, after winning a medal in the US, bravely detailed the battle that made him try. try to end your life.

“I have a big mental health problem in 2021. Not many people know this, but I literally tried to commit suicide,” he said.

“I was racing knowing I was injured all the time, racing knowing I wasn’t 100 per cent. I couldn’t attend the Olympics for some reason.

“All the people that have been around me, from my agent, to my coach, to my family, to my girlfriend, to be honest… a lot of people will be fractured, just need support. the best.

“During Covid, I was stuck in America alone. I love America, but I want to be with my family. It is so difficult.

“It was an emotional roller coaster ride. Imagine you’re walking on a rope when you know you’re injured. You have a lot of pressure because everyone expects a lot from you. You expect a lot from yourself.

“I made the decision in 2017 that I didn’t want to be one of those ifs. I want to take a big step towards getting a medal. Really and really I was able to stay in Birmingham. I love Birmingham.

“I never thought I would leave Birmingham. When I move it is now or never. You don’t want to look back and think ‘I could have done this or that’. “

Now living in Florida, Hudson-Smith also admits his injury problems caused him to accumulate a significant amount of debt which added to his problems, while he also lost sponsors.

“I have no insurance. I have a large debt. I remember talking to a lot of people about not doing sports,” he said.

“My mom and girlfriend were like ‘give it a year’. I’m going to be an electrician and then obviously I’m trying to get my Green Card.

“Things worked in mysterious ways because my Green Card was denied. My mom and the others said, ‘listen, just do it’ and now I’ve got this medal.

“I paid off (the debts) for them. Thankfully, I was picked up by Puma. They have been of great help.”

It was Great Britain’s fourth medal in Oregon after Laura Muir won the 1500m bronze, Dina Asher-Smith won the 200m bronze and Jake Wightman’s stunning 1500m gold.

Hudson-Smith outlined before the championship he was ready to give up athletics in 2014 and applied to join the Army while working in Asda.

But he persevered and the runner from Wolverhampton, broke Iwan Thomas’ 25-year-old British record at Hayward Field in May when he ran 44.35 seconds.

On the same track on Friday, he couldn’t beat his time with Norman running 44.29 seconds to win and James 44.48 seconds.

Hudson-Smith was mentored by 2008 Olympic 400m champion Christine Ohuruogu and, after overcoming his problems, believes his medal proves he can compete at the top.

“I always knew I could win a medal and had the potential to do it,” he said. It just solidifies it. I’ve seen it all, and maybe I’ve silenced a few. They could have said I should stay home, I’ve heard everything and they can’t really say anything now.

“All this year, my coach has been saying ‘the race is lost in the last 20 metres’. In the semi-final, I looked to the right and lost momentum. So in the final I was like ‘don’t look at the clock, do nothing’. So I just expect.

“It was an anxious wait and then I saw my name and I just fell to the floor because these three years have been absolute hell.”